Since I got back from vacation, I feel as though I’ve been cursed. First, I had a very hard time getting back into my work routine (although who wouldn’t after having just spent 7 days in the Caribbean?) Next, the guy I’ve been dating has backed off and hasn’t reached out to hang out since I got home. I never even received a ‘welcome back’ text or call from him. Just to top everything off, I’ve come down with a wicked cold and have been battling with a sore throat that will just not go away. Oh, and did I mention I have a crucial design conference coming up this Saturday?
Not that the past week and a half has been all bad. It’s been nice to catch up with my close friends again and I’ve also gone in for a job interview. Unfortunately, I didn’t get the paid internship but they did rave about my portfolio which is a boost to my confidence.
I’m just mainly upset about how this guy I’ve been smitten over the last few weeks has slowly been backing off. I did understand from the beginning he had recently come out of a long relationship and wasn’t looking for anything serious right away. However, my feelings were developing fast for him. I didn’t want them to, but he was really the first guy I’ve felt such an intense physical attraction/connection with. On top of that I always felt comfortable being around him and besides his child like immaturity at times, I loved it because it got me to loosen up and just live in the moment.
I even bought him a little token from one of the islands I visited. I’m upset that I thought about him so much, since clearly he hasn’t felt the same. It’s just hard to wrap my head around that since I hung out with him the day before I left for vacation. He gave me absolutely no signals that he wasn’t interested. We went tobogganing on a hill (that should probably be blocked off due to safety hazards), and then went to buy some burgers. Before getting the burgers we kissed for awhile in his car and I really felt like we were at a good pace in our relationship and felt hopeful about where things could go. After buying the burgers, he told me he had to drop me off (we couldn’t stay to eat) since his mom needed the car back and he had his older brother’s birthday party to attend. I wasn’t upset he didn’t invite me to come with, as we still weren’t exclusive. However, I would have loved to spend more time with him.
So I fed him french fries as we drove home as we blared 102.1 The Edge and I just felt… happy.
He kissed me goodnight and I got home wishing I didn’t have to leave for vacation so soon.
Now that I’m back I can’t help but question if there’s a new girl in his life feeding him french fries. I saw he was on the dating site the other day which was a bit upsetting but again, we weren’t exclusive so why should I be upset. I messaged him several days after I got back telling him I was home and he’s been making casual conversation. Even still asking me questions so not just providing one line responses. So what’s the deal??
I feel I deserve better. I want a guy who will take me on actual dates and won’t play mind games with me. However, I feel like I need closure from all of this and trying to figure out the best way to do it without scaring him off. Any suggestions? Also – any fast working cold remedies?